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The Nitpicker's Perfect Restaurant: a curmudgeon's utopia where everything runs smoothly and there's nothing to complain about.
As the Nitpicker column turns three years old, Jason Kessler takes a moment to appreciate all the things he loves about eating

Jason Kessler

Poor Nitpicker: His beloved Korean rice-bowl joint, Chego, has moved to a new neighborhood. What's a lazy takeout addict to do?

Jason Kessler

Is there a more user-unfriendly vegetable out there? And why, if they're such a pain to eat, does the Nitpicker keep eating them?

Jason Kessler

What's the difference between a two-star Michelin restaurant and a New York Times three-star? Who knows anymore? Not the Nitpicker

Jason Kessler

Is there any greater miracle than ordering food to your door? And is there any greater tragedy than when it doesn't show up on time?

Jason Kessler

The Nitpicker is stuck in a rut, ordering the same things from the same places. Is he too lazy to switch, or just too cheap? You decide!

Bon Appétit

The dry turkey, the insufferable relatives, the leftovers. (Oy, the leftovers.) Can't we skip it this year (and next)?

Jason Kessler

Especially when paired with goat cheese

Jason Kessler

It's time to get rid of this sticky excuse for a Christmas treat

Jason Kessler

Despite the fact that sugar binges make me feel terrible, both physically and mentally, I still go back for more

Danielle Walsh

It's the Designer Imposter of the culinary world.

Jason Kessler

There's one seafood that I've never been able to get behind: mussels.

Jason Kessler

With Halloween quickly approaching, we're about to enter a very special time: special-edition candy season.

Jason Kessler

Welcome to our new column, The Nitpicker. Jason Kessler loves to complain almost as much as he loves to eat. Join him on his journey through the imperfect universe of food.

Jason Kessler